Retirement Joke
 

Im sorry if you dont find this funny.. I mean cmon toad even got it and giggled!

Working people frequently ask us retired people what we do to make our days interesting. Well, for example, the other day I went into town and went to a small shop down on High Street. I was only in there for about 10 minutes. When I came out, there was a cop writing out a parking ticket. I went up to him and said, "Come on buddy, how about giving a senior citizen a break?"

He looked up, then ignored me and continued writing the ticket. I called him a heartless Nazi bastard. He glared at me and then started writing another ticket for worn tires. So I called him a piece of stinking dog sh*t. He finished the second ticket and put it on the windshield with the first. I called him an a$$hole and a pig. Then he started writing a third ticket. I called his mother a slut and a whore. This went on for about 20 minutes. The more I verbally abused him, the more tickets he wrote. Personally, I didn't give a sh*t. I came downtown by bus. I try to have a little fun each day now that I'm retired. It's important at my age.

lmao good one

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lol srry toad what was that?

:rolleyes:

:rolleyes:

yea niggers.. who saw britney spears husband preform at the teen choice awards? or atleast the video of it..Yea he sucks

Scatman - Scatman

(Scatting)
I'm the Scatman
(Scatting)
I'm the Scatman
(Scatting)

Everybody stutters one way or the other
So check out my message to you.
As a matter of fact don't let nothin' hold you back.
If the Scatman can do it so can you.

Everybody's sayin' that the Scatman stutters
But doesn't ever stutter when he sings.
But what you don't know I'm gonna tell you right now
That the stutter and the scat is the same thing.
Yo I'm the Scatman.

Where's the Scatman? I'm the Scatman.

Why should we be pleasin' all the politician heathens
Who would try to change the seasons if the could?
The state of the condition insults my intuitions
And it only makes me crazy and my heart like wood.

Everybody stutters one way or the other
So check out my message to you.
As a matter of fact don't let nothin' hold you back.
If the Scatman can do it brother so can you.
I'm the Scatman.

(Scatting)

Everybody stutters one way or the other
So check out my message to you.
As a matter of fact don't let nothin' hold you back.
If the Scatman can do it brother so can you.

I'm the Scatman.

I hear you all ask 'bout the meaning of scat.
Well I'm the professor and all I can tell you is
While you're still sleepin' the saints are still weepin' cause
Things you call dead haven't yet had the chance to be born.
I'm the Scatman.

(Scatting)
I'm the Scatman....repeat after me
It's a scoobie oobie doobie scoobie doobie melody
I'm the Scatman....repeat after me
It's a scoobie oobie doobie scoobie doobie melody
(Scatting)

uhm yea whens my cute title gonna change to something better?..more manly i prefer